Often times, when your adoptive child does not look like you, you will field questions from people for your child's entire life about your child's origins. Here are a few tips on how to deal with these prying questions.
#1 Stay Calm And Be Polite
When a stranger asks you a question that you feel is prying, hurtful or rude about your child in front of them, it is important that you stay calm and respond to them in a polite manner. You don't want to get angry or upset in front of your child.
Even though you may be angry or upset at the person asking the question, your child may interpret that asking about them makes you angry and upset. In order to ensure that your child only has positive feelings about their adoption, always stay calm when strangers ask you questions. Your child will be watching how you respond and will internalize that information.
#2 Keep Your Answers Positive
Remember that your child is listening to what you say. Even if you feel that the question was rude or invasive, keep your tone polite and your answers upbeat.
For example, if someone asks you if your child is your real kid or actually yours, don't play into what they are asking you. A quick, "yes, we are a family" or "of course this is my child" is an upbeat response that emphasizes to your child that you are a family.
If someone every comments on it being a shame that you don't have kids of your own, it is important that with your response you make it clear that your child is your own kid, and that you feel no shame in how your child came to be yours. An answer such as "I am so glad that I was blessed with X" is a great response or "I am so happy that I was able to choose X". Make sure that you emphasize that you are happy and that your adoptive child is as much your child as a biological child.
When someone asks you a question about your child in front of them, pay attention to your tone and response. Your child takes their hints from you. If you ever feel like a question was rude or upset your child, be sure that you take time to talk with your child and reassure them of your love for them. To learn more, contact a company like A Child's Dream.